There’s Really Nothing Interesting to Say

This week I haven’t felt like I had anything good to talk about so I have several drafts saved but very little writing done.  I’m not sure why nothing has been coming to me but it is incredibly frustrating.  But here is a little recap of what my week was like:

  1. I got a free G5 computer from a friend because they didn’t want to go through selling it and knew I wanted it.
  2. A friend who I can’t imagine would have any reason to be jealous of me said she was jealous that I have a job I like so much.  It made me realize that there is always something we have that someone else doesn’t and I shouldn’t get so down on myself for thinking I’m not making any progress in life.
  3. I learned that HE wasn’t exactly as loved by his friends as I thought he was and (I hate to admit it) but it made it a lot easier for me to stop thinking about him.  When you find out that people were confused as to why you were with him, and thought he treated you like a dog, you start to think, “hey, maybe he wasn’t as much of a saint as I seem to think he was.”  It also makes me wonder…”why the hell didn’t anybody say anything?”  I always assumed since none of his friends said anything to him when he treated me like shit in front of them that it was okay – if one of my friends treated their significant other poorly I would say something.  I suppose men are different.
  4. I finally got to go for a run/hike yesterday and it happened to be the most beautiful day in the history of ever.  I got lost and ended up in the Nature Preserve for an hour.  My endorphins were flowing so heavily I wanted to make love with the trees.  It. Was. Awesome.
  5. Last night I played DD to a very good friend of mine and, even though I hit tired at 11:45 and didn’t get home until 6:00, I happened to have a lot of fun last night.  Every once in awhile it is more fun to know you get to make sure your friend gets home safe than it is to get schwasty faced.  Karma, baby.

I have had so much to say this week but I haven’t been able to find the words.  I will continue to work on my drafts though because they have the potential to be great…or at least amusing.

I will also be working on answering this question:  What do you like to do for fun?

Someone asked me that last night and I realized I couldn’t answer them – I don’t really know anymore.  Or maybe I just don’t do what I like to.  I dunno…I will have to think about it.  How sad is that though?  Not knowing what you like to do for fun?  ::sigh::

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About izinspiredtowrite

I daydream constantly. I read everything. I fall upstairs. I trip on flat surfaces. I ask lots of questions. I believe in something great. I love. I live. I am.

Posted on September 9, 2012, in Events, Life, Random and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 9 Comments.

  1. I find that my witting flows better when I am doing something that feels me with passion. It might be worth finding out what you like to do for fun, fun things lifts you up, and inspiration follows…

    • I am trying, but…I don’t even know how to explain it. I feel like there is a wall that I keep hitting and everything I think will be fun ends up leaving me – I’m not sure how to put it, unfulfilled? sad? confused? Sometimes it feels like I just don’t know who I am. I feel like I know who I want to be but I also know I can’t pine for something I don’t have, I can only work towards it. I just always feel like I move backward instead of forward.

      • I have just come back from a Sufi Meditation retreat. When I read your words, I can’t help thinking that having a faith really helps. I Believe in a great spirit , sometime I call it the “Great mystery”. I know that when I am lost or confused or sad I can ask for help and help or guidance always come.

        It is worth remembering that we can’t do everything all by ourselves. There is help out there, all we need is ask. Prayers in your own words can help too.

      • I believe in something I just don’t know what to call it. I try to ask for help, but I think I may have difficulty realizing what it is when it comes….if that makes sense.

      • When it comes, it will feel so natural. Ask for help (it does not matter if you are not sure what to call it) and know that whatever it is that you ask for is already yours, any thoughts of you not being good enough will prevent help coming to you.

        Have you ever read the book called “Eat, Pray, Love” ?, I love the way the author talks to “God”, like you she is not sure who this so called “God” is and she does not know how to talk to him , so she talks to him as if he was a good friend living next door, it is both funny and very refreshing to think of it that way.

      • I have not read it, but my mom has it so I may borrow it from her. Sounds like I might be able to relate to her 🙂

  2. Good news about the G5: you have a superior replacement for the 360 you lost. Bad News about the G5: not all developers make a PC version of their games (Luckily CoD has one) and very few does that for Apple (not sure if CoD has one).

    About the non-intervention by friends: too common. People avoid getting in the middle of couple’s arguments. I tried once, but a girl and a guy friend of mine pulled me away saying “that’s between them and they alone should solve it”. I still don’t get it why not. In your case was either lacky of empathy by them towards you (for being associated with him) or they wanted you to see his true colors (I heard that once by a friend – “she should know what he is” – and “he” WAS a close friend of ours). It’s really complicated to understand or even think about it. Also, we [men] aren’t different, just idiots when in groups.

    Talk about tree huggin’. If we ever meet in person and go for a hike, remind me to get a GPS, I don’t want to get lost in the woods with you. It does sound awesome. I’m glad you had a great week and weekend… for some reason I don’t like to think of you sad. Cheers lass ❤

    • I don’t like playing games on a computer…I prefer a console.

      I guess I can understand not interfering, but when my friends do something I always let them know. Not necessarily at the moment, but always after. I mean, if someone had intervened maybe he wouldn’t have hurt me, maybe if someone other than myself told him that what he was doing was wrong he would have believed it. In my opinion it is not okay to just let something like that go. Maybe you won’t make a difference, but maybe you will. I understand letting people figure it out on their own, but why not try and help your friend become a better person, or recognize their faults. I will admit that I get upset when people say I have done something wrong but I always end up thankful that they let me know.

      And I didn’t really get lost, I just didn’t take my same trail so I ended up in there longer than usual. I always knew where I was…I have a map in my head most of the time. I rarely get lost when driving – only when I actually listen to the GPS do I get lost. Ironic, no?

      • Console preference… and I was starting to like you.

        We did tried to change him into a better person. He didn’t want to… that’s why he “WAS” a close friend. My friends always know my opinion after they do/say or tell they did/said something stupid (and I’m the friggin quiet guy of the group). Only way later they realized what I told them was right… usually too late to avoid consequences.

        Like you said, his friends didn’t like him that much, maybe they didn’t care about him et all. I’ve seen it happen on my own group of friends, I didn’t like it and I agree they should have said something. Sometimes people walk around with you for shallow interest, maybe it was his case. Or maybe they tried to change him and that’s why they don’t like him so much. What matters is that a person should have self-criticism to realize that their own words and actions affects and hurts others. Sounds like he didn’t bothered trying to improve himself to make you happy. How is someone not capable of realizing that? I feel like a hammer hitted my chest 5 minutes after any stupid thing I say to someone. If he cared about you really he would have treated you better and tried to change to make you happy. You deserve that, you deserve better than a guy that doesn’t realize he’s acting like an idiot.

        Oh my… you got lost with a GPS too? I thought it only happened to a friend and I during a road trip a few months ago (that was a fun trip – we failed the police test we went to do, but that was fun).

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